Don’t Jump to Conclusions!

Oct 21, 10 • Life3 Comments

You'd think that after 50 plus years, I would have figured out how to be patient.  But after being married to the same man (and the only one I've been married to!) for 30 plus years, I can usually predict what he will do next.  But not today…today he surprised me.

I am an imprecise woman.  If someone asks me, "Do you have any plans for the day?", my instinctive reply would be, "Do I need to have any plans for today?".  In many aspects, I am noncommittal - I prefer to take things as they come.  It's nice to not have a fully loaded day.  If I determine that I need or wantto do something, I have the flexibility to acommodate.  So when someone asks me what I consider to be a random question, I respond with a random answer.  Today was one of those sort of days.

My husband came to my workroom doorway and asked if there was anything that I planned on doing today.  I responded that I needed to leave to go to go to my shift at the Temple at about 4:15 pm, to which he promptly walked away.  I decided that I needed to go get bagels and pick up some parchment paper for Megan, who was going to be baking cookies while I was serving in the Temple.  My husband asked me when I would be back – common discussion when I leave the house – and I told him about 45 minutes.  That was the plan, but we all know that plans frequently change.

First stop was the Oroweat Bakery outlet for the bagels – Tom's routine breakfast is a bagel with turkey and cream cheese…we can't do Einstein's everyday, although I'd be hard pressed to give you a good reason why not!  I went to the next stop, Smart and Final, hoping to find a big roll of the parchment paper since we are getting into that baking-crazy time of year – no luck.  Small roll, super expensive.  Next, to Walmart…they have it and while it's not a huge roll, I know it's pretty inexpensive there.  While strolling down the aisle, I hear that unique ringtone…"Phantom of the Opera"…and I answered my husband's call.  "When will you be home?", he inquired.  "Not too long."   (Me being vague.)  "Can you be home in 15 minutes?"he asked.  "I don't know, maybe, but I was going to make another stop."  (Me, still being vague.)  "Well, I need you to be home in 15 minutes, 20 at the longest.  I have something I want you to see."

Rushing home "to see something" wasn't really in my running around plans for the day, which, I will admit that I decided to do AFTER I hadn't really made any plans.  You know, as long as you're out, you might as well save gas and get a bunch of errands done at the same time.  I had the parchment paper in my basket, but I had wanted to stroll the candy aisles since I hadn't purchased anything for Halloween yet.  I was hoping to get some of that caramel apple candy corn that I fell in love with last year.  I didn't want to have to go and get in my car and drive home to "see something". 

I have to admit – I was getting annoyed.  As a matter of fact, the walk to the check-out was mild compared to the walk to my car.  There was a lot of traffic when I got on the road and I had to sit through TWO lights, which gave me just enough time to get even madder.  I checked the time on my phone and realized that I wouldn't quite make the 15 min. deadline, but was hopeful for the 20 min. one.  I began to think calming thoughts…mostly because I really don't like to be mad and like staying mad even less.  As I turned down my street and was approaching my house, I was thinking, "This had better be good!"  When the house came into view, I could see that something was going on in front of it, some kind of truck was in the middle of the street.  Then it sunk in what was happening…and no, it wasn't the Publisher's Clearing House Prize team! 

Let me back up a little.  Mike's car's windshield had been vandalized when he was in La Jolla, parked on the street in front of La Jolla High, rehearsing for "Stephanie Hero".  Mike's car is what we call a "beater"…something purchased needing a paint job, dent repair…basically a face lift which we had no intentions of doing, which turned into engine repair, a new transmission, etc.  It was purchased for him to be able to take it off road.  I am suspicious that someone didn't like it parked in their pricey neighborhood or maybe it was a bored (and boorish) rich kid with nothing better to do.  Smashing in someones windshield is never a nice thing to do and this was intentional.  Mike was really upset about it. 

Today, out in front of the house, was a mobile auto glass replacement truck – it was getting fixed!  Then I realized that his wasn't the only cracked windshield in the family…I had a big crack, or rather series of cracks in mine.  The Expedition's windshield had been cracked for over a year, and I won't go into details on how it happened, but it didn't really bother me too much.  It was just one of those things that we would get around to…eventually.  But suddenly I knew why my presence had been required.  My kind husband, knowing that I would be traveling this weekend, wanted to make sure I would travel safe…which was all the more apparent when I got out of my car and noticed – for the first time -that I also had new tires on my Expedition – he said I was nagging him about it, but actually I had only mentioned needing new tires a couple of times in the past couple of months.  I know that was hard for Scott to get the tires because he a "make it do" person.  We don't usually change tires until the steel-belt starts showing or we get a flat and they refuse to repair it at the garage.  I would go ahead and take care of car maintenance myself, but Scott likes to be the one in charge of those kinds of things.  What I had managed to do single-handed, in my vague and noncommittal replies, was to spoil his opportunity to do it as a complete surprise.

I don't know why I had assumed that his requests were going to be a waste of my time.  He isn't in the habit of doing so.  But I did waste a lot of my time being annoyed and bothered.  Life would be so much easier if I could remind myself to expect the best of people, especially those that I love and know that they love and care for me.  Maybe I can be a little less vague…maybe not.  But I will be a happier if I spare myself unnecessary aggravation and don't jump to conclusions.  For now?  There is nothing better than…

a pristine windshield and monster tread on my tires!  Ah, the simple joys in life!  Thanks, honey!

Print Friendly, PDF & Email


3 Responses to Don’t Jump to Conclusions!

  1. Helen says:

    Yes, Oliver, they are! I wish that my husband would let me do more things like that. I would be more than happy to change out washers in the shower or hoses on the washer, things that I hate to bother him about after he comes home from a long day at work. I do tighten screws in the door handles or hinges if they get loose. He tells me he would show me but then he’s afraid I won’t need him for anything, so I resist my independent urges to do it behind his back and hope that I don’t ever find myself in the position to need him when he isn’t around:) Kind and thoughtful spouses are certainly something to be thankful for!

  2. Your husband is exactly like my wife. She’s a stay-at-home mom, so she likes attending to things that are inside and around the house, which includes my car. She’s the one who takes care of simple car maintenance, but she usually takes our car to our preferred auto shop as soon as she receives those thoughtful service reminders. Actually, she has already surprised me with a couple of car upgrades. Our spouses are so thoughtful, aren’t they?
    – Oliver Ganns

  3. Liz Naylor says:

    He was just telling me about that yesterday!! Dad is always the best at sneaky surprises!

Comment on this Article

Home...where you can always find warm words on a cold day.

↓ More ↓